Small things that would normally roll off you suddenly land harder, and you find yourself closer to tears, irritation or frustration than usual at work. Your feelings feel nearer the surface, and holding them steady takes more effort than it used to. This is a common sign of being stretched thin, and there are ways to give yourself a little more steadiness.

Why emotions get harder to hold steady

Keeping your emotions on an even keel takes energy, and when you are tired or under pressure there is simply less of that energy to go round. With your reserves low, your buffer against everyday knocks shrinks, so things affect you more than they would when you are rested. This is not a sign of weakness or that you cannot cope, it is what happens to anyone running low for a while. Knowing that can take some of the self-criticism out of it.

Give your feelings a little room

Emotions tend to settle more easily when they have some space, rather than being pushed down all day. That does not mean acting on every feeling, just acknowledging it instead of fighting it.

You could try:

• Naming to yourself what you are actually feeling, since that alone can take some heat out of it.
• Pausing before you respond when something lands hard, even for a few seconds.
• Stepping away for a moment when you feel your emotions rising, rather than pushing through.

Steady yourself in the moment

When a feeling surges, a few simple things can help bring you back to steadier ground before you carry on.

You could try:

• Taking a few slow breaths with a longer breath out, which helps settle the body.
• Getting a change of scene or a bit of fresh air for a couple of minutes.
• Focusing on something practical and concrete for a moment to let the wave pass.

Look after what raises your threshold

A lot of how easily you steady yourself comes down to the basics. Sleep, rest, regular food and a bit of movement all quietly raise the point at which things start to feel like too much. When emotions have felt harder to manage, being gentle with yourself and topping up those basics often does more than trying to grit your way through.

In short

• Treat wobbly emotions as low reserves, not weakness.
• Give feelings room by naming them rather than pushing them down.
• Pause or step away before reacting when something lands hard.
• Use slow breathing and a change of scene to steady yourself.
• Top up sleep, rest and food to raise your threshold.

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