Dragging yourself through the working day on a few broken hours of sleep is its own kind of hard. With a new baby waking in the night and a job that still needs doing by day, you are effectively running two shifts, and the tiredness from each piles onto the other. This is one of the more demanding stretches there is, and it deserves a gentler approach than usual.

Two demanding jobs at once

When your nights are broken by a baby, the usual advice about fixing your sleep does not really apply, because the wakings are not something you can tidy away. On top of that, work carries on expecting the same of you, so exhaustion builds from both sides at once. It helps to name this for what it is, a genuinely hard season rather than a sign you are not managing well. Once you stop expecting yourself to function as though you were fully rested, it becomes easier to be kind and practical about getting through.

Take the rest you can, even in pieces

When unbroken sleep is off the table, rest in fragments becomes the thing worth protecting. Rest still counts even when sleep does not come, so lying down quietly or closing your eyes for a while is not wasted. Little top-ups across the day help you keep going too.

You could try:

• Going to bed earlier when you can, rather than saving up rest for a lie-in that may not happen.
• Resting when the baby sleeps where possible, even without dropping off yourself.
• Getting daylight, water and something to eat across the day, since these steady your energy when sleep cannot.

Lower the bar while you are in it

Trying to keep every plate spinning at your usual standard is a lot to ask of a very tired body. For this stretch, good enough really is good enough, at work and at home. Letting some things slide is not falling behind, it is making room for what matters most right now.

You could try:

• Focusing on the few things that truly need doing each day and letting the rest wait.
• Easing your expectations of yourself at work while you are this stretched.
• Letting the house and the non-essentials be less than perfect for a while.

Let other people take some of the weight

You are not meant to carry all of this alone, even if it sometimes feels that way. If there is someone who shares your nights, splitting them as evenly as you can makes a real difference, and even one longer stretch of sleep helps. Beyond the home, people often want to help but do not know how, so saying yes to offers is worth doing.

You could try:

• Splitting night wakings with anyone who can share them, so you each get a longer run of sleep.
• Accepting offers of help, whether that is a meal, an errand or an hour to yourself.
• Being specific when someone asks what they can do, so the help actually lands.

Be gentle, this is a season

As relentless as it feels right now, this stretch does change as your baby's sleep settles over time. Until then, the aim is not to do it all brilliantly, but to get through it while looking after yourself as well as you can. Being tired and finding it hard does not mean you are doing anything wrong.

In short

• Treat this as a genuinely hard season, not a sign you are failing.
• Protect rest in whatever pieces you can get, since rest counts even without sleep.
• Lower the bar at work and home while you are in it.
• Share the nights and accept help wherever you can.
• Remember this stretch changes as your baby's sleep settles.

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